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The phone rang and from the way he spoke, I knew it had happened. The long battle had ended. Another life lost to Cancer…

I was out shopping when I heard about what had happened. I don’t think I can put into words what went through my mind then. His image flashed before my eyes. An image of what had become of him since he was diagnosed with cancer a few months back.

I’ve only met him a few times. I remember him as a big built man, old but still not showing signs of the age. More than anything, I remember him as a healthy man. And then I met him during my last visit to Kerala. I couldn’t recognise him. I never thought a disease could change a man to such an extent. He looked old, weak, gaunt….. He didn’t look like himself. Cancer had caught upto him. Final stages they said. His body wouldn’t be able to handle any sort of medication, chemo-therapy or radio-therapy. They gave him pain-killers to reduce the pain. They had given up on him.

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Memories of what had happened around 3 years back are coming back to me. “Let’s hope for the best”, they said, almost like in the movies. Cancer was something that happened in movies or to other people, not to people we know, not to your family…

They said something about 5 years. 5 was just a number before that…but now it has taken a whole different meaning. 3 years, 8 months and 28 days are up.

I don’t know what to expect…

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Hope the family gets the strength to make it through this loss.

I miss the not having anything to do….well, not really. Life’s become hectic and I’m liking it!

I almost wanted to give up when I first started. Somethings came as a shock. But I’ve slowly come to terms with it. I was a little apprehensive about going back to India but I never thought I would actually not be going back! :-/

Classes have been good. I’m all set to make the most of it. Had a presentation yesterday. I was sooo not looking forward to it. Never been much of a speaker and I freak out when I have to do that in front of people. Buttttt it turned out alright. I didn’t make an utter fool of my self. I actually had a few people come and tell me it was pretty good for a first timer! 😀

I miss the freedom, the familiar faces and more than anything else…I miss the good conversations. Anyways, Its only been 2 weeks now. I’m still in the process of getting to know people. Things might change. First impressions could be wrong. And if things remain the same, I’m just gonna have to grin and bare it !